Change

“IF YOU REALLY WANT CHANGE, YOU’D BE DOING IT. YOU HAVE TO WANT IT SO BAD THAT YOU HAVE TUNNEL VISION. YOU HAVE TO WANT IT SO BAD THAT NO EXCUSE IS GOOD ENOUGH TO STOP”. – TRENT SHELTON

By: Joseph Green

This is a quote that really moved me. Given my current circumstances I want nothing more than change. I’ve been striving for change and growth both physically, mentally and spiritually. By the grace and mercy of my creator it’s a process that I’m enduring. Recently I encountered a situation in which I came across a guy who was friends with my victim. Obviously he still held some anger and hatred towards me for what he thought I had done. I was now being tested, would I still think like the old me or the new me.

I took this moment and time to exercise the new me. To put into practice my growth both spiritually and mentally. I knew that I was being tested by Allah to see if I was truly ready to return to my family and friends. Being the bigger man I took this man aside and had a conversation. I wanted to express to him that I understand his hurt and pain. Being that I lost a couple close friends to gun violence not long after my arrest. However when do we began to see that we was uncivilized boy’s with no guidance. Doing our culture, ancestors, community and family a great disservice. As men we now have a responsibility and duty to teach the youth the hardships and consequences of dumb and irresponsible decisions. Why would we continue to promote and carry on in such a way? We are meant to be mentors for the youth and sharing our mistakes so that they don’t make the same ones. We never had the proper guidance or mentors. Now from our experience we can change the direction of those walking those same steps we did. I don’t know about anybody else here but this shit (prison) is not cool or fun. I have lost 14 years of my life for something I did not do and for what? What have I gained besides a prison number and grey hairs? Yes, for those that know me I have grey hairs now…don’t judge me!

I understand that in order to see change I must apply action to the knowledge gained. I have tunnel vision to prove my innocence and return home to my family. I won’t allow anyone to detour me from this mission. As a MAN I stand tall knowing that real power is not in your physical ability but in your mental fortitude to make the necessary changes to be great. To be able to make the right decisions in the toughest moments. I give all praise to Allah (god) for taking me on this journey of growth and evolution. For its making me a better man.

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