How Breast Cancer Affected Me

Hello T.B.T.W.


This Is John J. MURRIEL#406018

I Want To Talk About How Me And My Family Was Affected By Breast Cancer.

When I Was Younger I Was Locked Away In Boys Ville. But before I Went Me And My Big Sister Was Partners In Crime. I Was at Boy’s Ville For About Three Years, Never Once Receiving A Letter Or A Note From My Big Sister.
Being Young And Emotional, I Allowed Resentment To Fester. So The Day Before I Was To Be Release From Boy’s Ville, I Made A Foolish Promise To My Self That Anyone Who Couldn’t Collect A Letter They Wrote Me During My Time In Boy’s Ville Was Dead To Me No Matter Who They Once Was To Me!


Years Came And Went, But I Was True To My Word. Never Saying One Word To My Big Sister. Not Even Hi.
So In 2004, I Was Receiving Calls For Months From Different Family Members Asking Me To Stop By, And Some I Would Answer, Asking Them How The Hell Did They Get My Phone Number? While I Was On One Of Them Family Calls My Cousin Who Was Like A Sister To Me Asked Me To Meet Her At My Grandmother’s House. I Agreed.


As I’m Driving Up My Grandmother’s Lil Dead End Street I Notice It’s No Where For Me To Park My Truck. As I Turn Around At The Dead End I See My Big Sister Car. In My Mind I Say (Nope) This Is Some Kind Of Family Intervention. I See A Few Family Members Coming Out Of My Grandmother’s House In Tears, So I Roll Down A Window, And Ask A Aunt Of Mines What’s Wrong, She Starts To Tell Me, But Breaks down Mid-Sentence.

At This Point I Know It’s Something Serious. I Jump Out My Truck Leaving It In The Middle Of The Street. As I Run Into My Grandmother’s House I See Everyone Around The Couch Talking To A Lady Who Slightly Resembled My Big Sister, This Lady Sees Me. And Reaches A Hand Out. And Say, I Didn’t Think You Was Going To Come. As Soon As I Hear The Voice I Know It’s My Big Sister On The Couch Looking Sickly. I Panic And Feel The Ice Melting Away From My Heart. All I Want To Do Is Help This Frail Version Of My Big Sister… So I Set And Listen To My Family Members Talk To My Big Sister Into The Wee Hours Of the Morning.


Then It Was Time For Me And My Big Sister To Talk, The Thought Never Crossed My Mind To Tell My Big Sister Why She Was Dead To Me, Because From The Looks Of Things That’s A Possible Reality. As I Listened To My Big Sister Talk To Me After So Many Years, I Was Praying To God To Give Me More Time To Make Things Right With My Big Sister. It Was The First Time I Had Asked God For Anything In Over Sixteen Years. During My Conversation With God I Told Him If He Gave Me The Time I Would Never Stop Putting Fourth The Effort.
Being That My Big Sister Didn’t Die That Night, I Was There The Next Day And Night. And The Next Day And Night. All The Doctor Appointments, Late Night Dizzy Spells & Cough Attacks. Until My Big Sister Made A Full Recovery. Today Makes It Sixteen Years Later, And Not A Day Goes Past That I Don’t Put Forth The Effort That I Asked God For ,To Talk To My Big Sister Everyday, Even If It’s Just For A minute To Ask How Did She Sleep !!!